Getting more and more anxious about things Especially nursery !

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Permalink Reply by Verity on January 27, 2012 at 8:26pm

Catherine I completely can see where you are coming from. My partner also doesn't understand why I get so frantic about milk intake but milk is so important at the moment. I would be worrying nursery wise too, I think it isn't good of them to of ignored your requests. Could you bring this up with one I then. There is strict instructions which you have put in place for Cians health and they should follow them! I've decided not to go back to work as I wouldn't be able to cope with someone else looking after Finley with all his diet needs etc etc.

Has cian not eaten potato before? Do they wore you out a info sheet of what cian has taken milk wise dying the day.

Finley goes into a crèche when I go to a group only in the room next door but they write a sheet of when he has his milk and how much he takes and write down everything he has done and I find that really helps me feel more happy about leaving him. 

I'd take it up with the nursery nurse manager as its really not acceptable to do things which you've asked them not to do not only for cian but also for you, your now going to be worrying about it.

Big hugs xx

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Permalink Reply by Claire Cole on January 27, 2012 at 8:58pm

Sorry not going to be any help here but reading with interest as freddy will be going to nursery at the beginning of April and Im worried about them taking my requests seriously. I know the girls that work there well as my other son is there too and they are good at their jobs I just don't know if they will appreciate how sensitive these things can be.
Verity that's interesting you saying that you are not going back to work as I was going to ask how many of the mums on here work and if not is it due to their child's health? And those that do have they found problems with their child care due to reflux?

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Permalink Reply by Claire Allison on January 27, 2012 at 9:20pm

hi catherine,

 

 i dont think you are overreacting at all. nursery should not be giving foods  that you havent agreed to. i would be having a word with the manager. you really need to nip it in the bud now and  make them take it seriously. I have just had an issue with Rosies nursery too and have arranged to go and speak to the manager on monday afternoon as i am furious with the staff because they have not been doing as i have asked. Unfortunately i am in a situation where i dont have any other childcare options but i am considering using a childminder if i have anymore problems. I think its hard enough for us as it is with our LO's without people not taking us seriously.

 

book to speak with the manager asap hun x

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Permalink Reply by Alison C on January 27, 2012 at 10:11pm

Hi Catherine ,

As the other ladies have said, you are not overeacting at all. They have a responsibility to ensure that all children are safeguarded, taking into consideration all individual needs. I think they could get into serious trouble for not following instructions. If it was Lily I would go mental. (Im a bit of a hot head where shes concerned- the husband tells me I need to chill more)

Did u get a contract with the nursery?  They should have everything noted down. Deffo speak to the Mgr as soon as you can. If they were in doubt as to whether to give him certain foods they could have called you to ask. It would have only taken them a minute.

Really hope u get this sorted xx

 

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Permalink Reply by Catherine Walker on January 27, 2012 at 10:35pm

Verity , no I didn't give them permission to give potato , I said I needed to trial it again! 
That's a good idea I will ask them to log down his milk intake.

Thanks girls, I had started to question that I was loosing perspective and my husband sometimes makes me feel I'm making mountains out of molehills !
I will have a word with the manager and put her in the full picture , tell her about the A&E visits and hospital admission she may then take me seriously. I started to worry when the cook questioned and he been tested !! When I replied no as they are not reliable I felt she thought I was an over anxious mother ! And if she'd been through  half of what we go through with our LO's she would be anxious too !! 
At least you girls put it into perspective for me ! Thankyou xx

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Permalink Reply by Catherine Walker on January 27, 2012 at 10:37pm

Ps Alison - if my husband tells me to stop worrying and calm down one more time I think I will land him one on the nose ! Lol 
Xx

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Permalink Reply by Verity on January 28, 2012 at 7:12am

Finley is only in the crèche for 2 hours and has 1 bottle whilst there but they write down what time he has it and how much he has. They also write down his nappy changes and what he's been playing with, makes me feel better! 

I've been battling against PND and anxiety problems since having Finley so that's one reason I don't feel I could go back to work as it would set me back and undo the work I've put in to get better. Finley's health is a big factor too, I only trust my partner and my mum to look after him and they both work full time. Finley's reflux is pretty much under control now, it's the allergies, intolerances and his eating habits that worry me. I also watch him like a hawk for reactions, his behaviours and his toilet troubles.

Xx

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Permalink Reply by Catherine Walker on January 28, 2012 at 9:54am

Same here Verity , I was refered by my HV to a group called  " time for you " and we had a free crèche for two hours and they ( for 6 weeks )were great , I could cope with two hours my anxieties are the fact he will be there all day  and they will give him every meal . 
I have no other childcare options unfortunately so I have no option and I have to go back to work due to the size of our mortgage !!
Hope your feeling better ? Feel free to PM or if your on Facebook add me as a friend xx

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Permalink Reply by Verity on January 28, 2012 at 10:34am

It's hard enough having a baby without all the unforeseen problems it brings! 

Could you type out a sheet with when his bottles and meals are and get them to fill it in as to what he has and how much. Then the give it to you or your husband when you pick cian up. That way you would have in front of you what he has had and how much and will hopefully make you feel less anxious. Little reflux babies aren't simple an easy, they need watching and monitoring. Try to explain maybe why you need the information and why things need to be done how you say.

I am feeling better, well getting there! Thank you I will keep that in mind.

Hope you get things sorted with the nursery xx

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Permalink Reply by Catherine Walker on January 28, 2012 at 8:30pm

Thanks Verity, I will do that xx

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Permalink Reply by laura taylor on January 28, 2012 at 9:27pm

Could you take your own food so you are more in control of what they are giving him?
X

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Permalink Reply by Beverley Ward on January 28, 2012 at 10:39pm

Hi Catherine,

I've only just caught up with this.

I would go ballistic if my nursery gave Douglas anything I hadn't authorised. You're not over-reacting at all. I can only leave him and do some work because I absolutely trust the people looking after him. The room leader asks to have a meeting with me every time I go to a hospital appointment so that she's up to speed and they ask me how we've gone on with each food trail etc They don't let him play with any food stuff and I was really touched that they have a learning plan for him which includes time spent with other sensory materials where the others might play with jelly etc

I would complain and provide them with as much written material as you can. I took in FABED leaflets which clearly explain how horrible EGID is. I know Cian doesn't have EGID but something like that about food allergies might be helpful. Complain to the manager but you also need the team leader for his room to be thoroughly up to speed.

And, I'd agree with Laura. Can you take your own food with a clear schedule of what he's to have when? I know it's a faff but at least then you're in control. I'd be so worried about slip-ups in the kitchen even if they said they were doing what you asked.

Some of the anxiety is normal when you're leaving your first child for the first time and to some extent you do have to relinquish a bit of control about how much water he's had and when he's slept etc but they should do exactly as you ask regarding his food.

I don't think you're over-reacting but the other thing to think about is whether you can get more milk into him at the beginning and end of the day. There's nothing to stop you giving him custard when he gets home for instance. Lots of kids I know have a kind of supper after nursery because nursery tea is usually served ludicrously early so that they can get everyone cleaned up before 5pm.

Hope you can get things resolved.

x

Speaking of going ballistic, my 4 year old told me this morning that my partner had given Douglas a bit of her pancake this morning! Yes, that's Douglas who is on a severely restricted diet of butternut squash and potato, who is allergic to innocuous foods like parsnip and potato, and who recently saw Dr Shah at GOSH (with Tim in the room) where we were told not to try him with anything other than root veg. So he thought he'd try with all the top allergens in one go! So, not just nurseries you can't trust sometimes!

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