13 month old still waking at night - Have you given up on ever getting a good nights sleep?

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Permalink Reply by Zoe Davies on February 4, 2009 at 17:50

Hi. Isaac is now 11 months and like your little one his sleep was appalling. He would go to bed after his milk at about 8 o'clock and then wake after an hour at the most screaming etc often inconsolable and often was then sick everywhere. After this he'd go back in his cot and go to sleep but we'd be up and down all night sometime every hour and in the end put in in with us just so we would at least be able to lie down if not sleep. He wasn't hungry and was really tired and I was sure it was reflux disturbing him in the evening and throughout the night. It was absolutely killing us - we were both exhausted and no one could help as some evenings we couldn't even comfort him. It got really bad over Christmas when he only wanted me and wanted to sleep holding me or striking my face. One night I couldn't take any more and went in the spare room. Isaac yelled for the whole hour he was gone - despite being in bed with his dad - and in the end I decided we'd put him in his cot and see what happened. Anyway he yelled lots and kept standing up and every 5 minutes we went in and laid him down, said good night and came out - often he was yelling before we'd left the room. Eventually after another 3 hours he fell asleep (standing up in his cot). This night was the breakthrough for us. Virtually every night since (apart from when he's been suffering with teething) we have gone to him and laid him down and then left him to cry (5 minutes at a time) and the time he's cried for has got less and less. Our problem times are the evenings as if we leave him to cry he'll be sick.
I also cut out his bottle at 7.30pm as I am convinced it was making his reflux really bad in the evening and giving him wind and I now give him water and porridge instead which seem to suit him better. We still have to hold him til he goes to sleep and have had nights of reflux where the porridge returns, but our nights are 100000000 times better than they were and often going to Isaac and lying him down or giving him a dummy once will mean he goes back to sleep. It does sound mean leaving him to cry - but when we know it is pain he is in we always pick him up, and it was destroying us being so tired. I think Isaac was so used to us going to him he cried whenever he woke - be it reflux related or not.
I totally understand where you are coming from. We've had a tough month but the results for us have been worth it. We've still got a long way to go - and would love Isaac to fall asleep by himself, but at least we are getting a stretch of sleep in the night (he wakes at about 5 but from when we go to bed til then often we'll only hear him a couple of times).
Really hope this makes sense and maybe will help.
Good luck.
Zoe x

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Permalink Reply by Sim on February 5, 2009 at 19:26

not sure if it is much use but we ditched the dummy. we found that we had to go in several times in the night when amelia woke but dummy would instantly put her back to sleep. it is difficult listening to them cry a little bit but we substituted dummy for s bunny rabbit, easier for her to find herself to self comfort. then when she goes down for a nap or bed we shae bunny's feet (they have beans in them) and out him snuggled up to her and she ends up playing with him or chewing him a bit!! there were a few crys to begin with but we gradually increased the length of time before going in and fingers crossed she sleeps better. Oh amelia is 8 months.
also have you had your son checked for allergy to milk or tried a hyposllergenic milk for intolerance??

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Permalink Reply by Caroline Robinson on February 5, 2009 at 22:32

Thanks for your replies. It's very much appreciated.
Unfortunately controlled crying didn't work for us. I tried it a couple of months ago for about 3 weeks. Matthew actually started waking up every hour. I did try staying with him until he fell asleep and then gradually withdrawing from the room but that hasn't helped either.
Although his dummy gets him off to sleep early on in the evening - 7.30 pm - Midnight, just sticking his dummy in later on in the night just doesn't work. We often go in to find him sat up in the cot with his dummy in his mouth, crying or coughing. So I do want to get him off the dummy eventually but this doesn't seem to be our problem.
I haven't had Matthew checked for allergy to milk or intolerance. Maybe that is something we will have to look into.
I think I will try cutting down on his last bottle and see whether that might help.
I don't hold out much hope as I think it is the reflux. I've sort of given up on hope after trying lots of different things but we keep thinking hey what have we got to lose!! Thanks again.

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Permalink Reply by Jo on February 6, 2009 at 11:14

Hello.

My baby woke up every 1-2 hours during the night until he was 10 months old. He is now 14 months old. He has been taking Domperidone and Omeprazole since 5 months old, and is currently on 9ml of Domperidone, and 20mgs of Omeprazole a day. He was waking up screaming because he was uncomfortable, but his problem seemed to be wind rather than coughing. I felt very strongly that something he was eating or drinking was aggravating the problem, and tried cutting different things out of his diet over several weeks. Eventually the only thing I hadn't cut out was the Aptamil. I saw my GP who agreed to a trial of Nutramigen. It took about a week to wean him onto it properly as the taste was so different, but after 4 days of starting it, he slept through (admittedly only from 8pm-4am!!!) for the first time ever!! Since then his wind has been much better, and now that he is not uncomfortable when he wakes in the night he quite happily puts himself back to sleep of his own accord, and (touch wood!!!) to date I have not needed to try any sleep training during the night, as he only seems to cry and want us to go to him if he is in pain. His reflux also seems a bit better(....which may be a coincidence, or may be because he is starting to grow out of it). It is not perfect all of the time, but (again touch wood!!!) he now generally sleeps through until 5am/6am, which although not ideal as is still rather early, is so much better than before!!

I have since found that if he has any type of food that aggravates his wind, he is again up every 1-2 hours in the night being uncomfortable. Currently he hasn't been formally tested for any food intolerances (we are seeing the consultant again next week), but the fact that his symptoms are so easily flared up when he has a particular food is evidence enough for me at the moment!! I avoid dairy, lactose, gluten and egg with him as these all seem to aggravate his symptoms. My health visitor has been very supportive, and referred us to a dietitian who we are seeing 2 monthly.

We make sure that after his last bottle (which he normally has about 6.30pm, and takes anything up to 8oz) we keep him upright for at least half an hour. This helps, but for some reason we still find it very difficult to get him off to sleep in the evening as he seems to struggle a bit with wind at this time, and we stay with him at the moment as he often needs some help to get the wind moving!!!(ie. picking him up to help him burp, rubbing his tummy etc), but as soon as the wind has passed he drops off to sleep straight away of his own accord.

Sorry to have rambled on!!! I'm not sure whether any of this will be of any use to you, or whether you are already on nutramigen, but for us, reviewing his food and milk has made a huge difference, as I too had given up hope of a sleep more than a couple of hours!!! As I say...it is not always perfect, and his wind in the evenings is still a problem, but it is much better now at night, which makes a huge difference to how I can cope in the day!!!

Hope this might help a bit!!! Good luck!!

Jo

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Permalink Reply by Helen on February 10, 2009 at 14:02

Hi. Grace is now 18 months old and has not slept through the night since she was around 6 mths old so I know only too well how you feel. Every now and again she will settle down a bit and maybe wake only once or twice a night. Those nights seem very few and far between. We try to figure out did we do anything differently those days and analysis everything that she eats have not figured it out. She will wake around 4 times a night and cries so hard even when i lift her. She usually struggles with me and wants to be put back down. I have discussed this with my doctor who says it may be a routine she has got into, but I know that she is uncomfortable. Nobody understands unless they have been through it themselves. There are foods that I now avoid that seem to make her reflux flare up like acidic fruits and gluten which makes her incredibly windy. I have no idea when Grace will start sleeping better, although I definately think that when she is teething her reflux flares up again. We have just learned to accept that this is the way it is, however every now and again it will get me down. We live in hope that someday her reflux will not bother her and she will sleep better!
Helen

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Permalink Reply by Patch on February 20, 2009 at 20:32

Hi

George is heading to 11 months and still wakes at night. I am resigned to the fact that I will now share a bed with him as I do not have the energy to figure out how to stop him shouting at night. One thing that has helped his sleep is cranial osteopthy. I dont know if it is his body getting better and maturing or the osteopathy but his sleeping has got better. he has had 3 sessions and I feel it has worked. Well worth the money.

Best of luck

patch x

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Permalink Reply by Caroline Robinson on February 24, 2009 at 10:49

Hi

Thanks again to everyone for taking the time to reply to my question.

I've tried a couple of things in the last few weeks - I tried giving Matthew less milk and then we tried a different milk too. He was on Aptimel and we tried SMA Staydown. Neither of these changes produced any improvements.

We too now share a bed with our little man. Like lots of you out there we just decided it was a way we could get a little bit more sleep. Paul and I take it in turns so we do get a good night sleep alternate nights. Luckily we can do this because Paul works 4 days and I do 3. It's funny how lots of our little one's do similar things in the night. Matthew goes down by 8ish and sleeps soundly until about 11.30ish sometimes 10.30ish. He then wakes coughing and will not settle in his cot. So we just whisk him into bed with us. He then moans and cries thru the night but settles quickly in bed with us once we give him his dummy - often his eyes are shut and he stays asleep. Often it's wind that does it. So overall at least we are not up and down to him in the cot.

I tried Cranial Osteopathy when Matthew was very small and didn't find it made any difference but I'm interested to hear if you do have any success.

We are due back at the hospital next week and I'm already composing my list of questions re:diet. But we have decided that hope is futile and we're resigned to this continuing for a while yet.

In a strange way it's a comfort to know that there are other families out there going thru the same and we're not the only ones.

What does make it difficult though is getting a break. My parents are staying this weekend as we have 2 nights away. First time in 14 months! Yippee - although on the other hand I'm worried how they will cope. I've pre-warned my Mum - I'm not sure she realises how bad it is. Will be interesting to see if she does any thing different and what effect it has. My husband is hoping it will show them how hard we've had it. Anyway we will see . . .

Good luck to everyone

Take care
Caroline
x

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